Tuesday, December 2, 2008

HEY HEY HEY im bored


Here is my family tree. i got really bored... and i think i missed a few but oh well... i couldnt fit phil in, he married diane. and i didnt feel the need to go above my grandparents lol... ------ means married to. ____ means i had to fill it in or it wouldnt publish correctly lol. _ basically means i was spacing and blogger wont publish more than 1 space....


STARKEY SIDE_________________________RAVSON SIDE
Maggie------------Harold______Laura--------------Zachary
___|____________|________________________|
Diane_________George-------------------Summer
___|____________|________________________|
Travis___________Lemanda_____________JULIAN-----___?
Anycia______________|_____________________|
Danielle__________Dylan_______________(SECRET)
cousins in order
of age, not importence...
if it were importance then
danielle would be first <3


i left the person i am married to blank cuz... well... idk who that is. same with my kiddies. i could guess but that would do no good, now would it?

Good Day Sunshine.

hang on, gotta call someone. December 2nd, 2008. 3:09 pm

mmk im back.
you know what i want for christmas?
a big hug :)
thats it.
just a hug
doesnt matter who
as long as you are a girl (i am indeed sexist, but i dont hate guys i just prefer to talk with girls)
i just wana a hug
nothin else
well... maybe... eh nvm, a hug will do :)
actually maybe a cuddle too? im cold. brrrr!!!
i cant wait... 1 1/2 years and im far away from here!
of course where i am going it is... slightly colder than here...
depending on what area anyway. i havent chosen an area yet
but my friend is coming too! yay!
yes she is a female and not a guy lol
no i am not dating her. she is too good for me ;)
we can turn the heat up all the way though! and have as many blankets as we want!
i am very hungry right now too
and somewhat thirsty
my cell got taken away... grr
i didnt even do anything
like seriously... i am sick and was gunna stay home and my dad comes in my room while im trying to sleep and says "gimme ur phone"
it sucks cuz i wanna talk to my friends
the few that i have

im going to talk to my "wife" now... we arent really married, just pretend we are lol
brrrr im cold
who wants to cuddle!!!!!
i am so bored...


anyone wanna playa game?
im gunna... hmm... idk what im gunna do.
maybe ill go cry. yeah. that might keep me warm and occupied lol
actually i will go make some soup for me, be right back

ok now im back.... lalalalaaaa... took me 10 minutes lol. whatever...
its good soup. nice and warm. hehe

im still cold... its been a long, long, long time
since i have been warm
too long actually...
=(

(not my song, this is Only A Northern Song by the beatles... but i added a few changes to it)

if you are listening to my song, you may think my chords are wrong
but they're not
i just wrote it like that

if you are reading late at night, you may think the words are not quite right
but they are
they just printed like that

it doesnt really matter what clothes, i wear or how i fare
or if my hair is brown
cuz this is my song

I AM ONE OF THE BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE!!!!
and so are you :)
how does it feel to be
one of the beautiful
people?

feels gooooood

so anyways... i looked at my mirror the other day... well not my mirror, the one in the bathroom. and i noticed that my eye color had changed. its been a while since i looked in my eyes but they had changed. they used to be completely hazel with little green spots. now i have like 3 areas... kinda like if you cut the earth in half? the core is entirely hazel but darker than before... outside of that my eyes are a mixture of light blue and green. looks cool... and outside of that is a very thin ring of very dark blue. my eyes are so cool now lol. ill draw a picture and put it in here...

yep. i uploaded it. thats kinda what my eye looks like... except my eye looks alot cooler in person and its 2-D... i think ill go now. i gotta go contradict myself... a pacifist playing violent video games lol. i usually just heal people so its all good :D

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Why hello there!

i have returned. plenty of poems, some of which i do not wish to share quite honestly. i took a vacation and went on some meditation after my pet turtle franklin died. looots of thinking went on... but i have returned. would just like to let everyone know that. aaaaand... coven... i love you! just wanted you to know that!

[::crayola::]>

P.S. we are the beautiful people. do not forget that. no matter what you have or what you lost... you are still beautiful.

P.S. #2 i miss franklin... but i am glad he is in a better place. his time came. i hope he is happy in the underworld with his turtle ancestors and such... he died so young... a turtle of 20 years... poor guy. i love him. he used to help me write my poems... i may need someone else to help me now... maybe my cat paris. i have no idea why im even saying all of this... lol. time for awkward silence!

..................................................................................

ok that was awkward enough. NO MORE DYING!!!
time for life. save the babies! save the orphans!
by the way, this isnt a poem or anything. im just reeeeally high. hehe... woops

| -------> |
| ^ |
V | V
|
--> -------------------------------> i am one of {TBP}
join me ;)
i really feel like going to paris. seems like a nice place to be... then oregon. that also seems quite nice. so much... pennies in my ears. and in my eyes. blinded by the light. what a beautiful sight... taken so long, long, long... time.... could i ever have lost you? then i... loved you. it took a long, long, long... time.... time to be the sign. banner of death, scarred with blood. someone wastes away, be one with the mud. harmony extracted out of the air... how i loved your hair...

i like this song! have you seen the little piggies, crawling in the dirt... and for all the little piggies, life is getting worse...

KAP!!!!!!


Wszędzie tam jest wielka ilość świń, żyjący świnia życia. Wy możecie widzieć & (oni) poza dla obadu, z ich żonami świni. Chwytanie widelców i noże. Żeby jeść boczek.

i dont expect anyone to know that. i only know it because it is one of the languages of my heritage. and i am proud. woohoo! jestem polskie i dumny. kinda funny cuz one of my good friends is german. Nienawidzą tamte przeklął Niemcy! ugh. seriously. what the fuck lol. i see gold within the eyes... those eyes had their share of cries... for the life that has died... the beauty of what is inside...

Śpią dość dziecko, nie krzyczy (ogłaszać), i będę śpiewać spanie śpiewu.

almost time it is
for me to retire
show me you love me
and i'll show you a liar

whisper sweet things in my ear
baby what are you doing to me
something tells me you blaspheme me
you are someone i wish you would be

christmas time is here again
get in the bomb shelter
I wy nie będziecie widzieć mnie
To jest czasem dla mnie udawać się

here comes the sun
bright and early, shine on us
you're not the same
but i do not care

thats what i get for babbling a fish
i ask if you want to have some fun and what do you do?
you hand me a straw.
what the hell dude
i dont do that stuff
so i pass it to the next one
and i walk away
because i am cold
and need my jacket
some warmth to wear
because nobody wants to cuddle
with the fool which is me

HaPpY tUrKeY dAy To AlL mY aMeRiCaN fOlLoWeRs!

cuz ur the only loves that ive ever had!
dont you give me that finger
put that away before i chop it off
JUST KIDDING! im a pacifist
its really tough to be a pacifist...
when people intentionally piss you off
i was about to punch this kid in the face
for what he was doing
funnier part is
he is my sister's boyfriend
well... WAS
he broke up with her
again
lol

sheep say LOOOOOOOOL
not BAAAAAAH
trust me on this one, i heard em
so as soon as i am sober
i shall put the poems up that i wish to share
and i am currently working on a few of them


Robi moja polska rozmowa dręczą wszelki? Robi wy obmyślacie to dokucza?

my feet are wicked fucking cold
i think i shall protest something
not sure what though
but ill think of something
im good like that
i am a terribly good arguer
which is why i get in trouble... because im "rude"
my parents are just jealous that i always win arguements
ok i gotta go...
she is calling again
the new bird... for now.
she will fly soon
but i will keep her while she lasts


TBH
To będzie panować wkrótce! My jest nie jest przerywał przez was albo wasz armia. Ni może przerywać my. Żeby pomagać my, mówią mnie gdzie wy odchodził. będziemy zwalniają was i łączą zwyciężać dla dobrego ludzkiego widok.

Sunday, October 12, 2008

NEW SONGS

they are on the bottom... check them out, i couldnt find 2 of my favorite songs to post but if you have the chance you should listen to them... both by the beatles. "baby you're a rich man" and "sgt pepper's lonely hearts club band (reprise)" sgt pepper's is just like the one at the bottom except faster and i think its better... i like the reprise better than the original but thats just my opinion =)

Saturday, October 11, 2008

Kaitlyn Starkey


i was going through my emails from a while ago and came across something my sister wrote for me when i was depressed... i didn't know i still had it. it is really nice, and i think it applies to anyone having struggles... oh yeah... and... I LOVE YOU KAITLYN!!!!!! YOU'RE THE BEST SISTER ANYONE COULD EVER HAVE!!





Everyone.. without exception, has once had something go wrong. We all at times, feel like we are nothing. The world can be huge at times.. and like it and everyone else forgot all about us. There are times when we feel hate.. or have been hated. Like we aren’t good enough for someone. Worried that we shouldn’t try something new. All have are own stories, experiences, memories… and the truth is, pain is temporary; but the experiences are forever.


We aren’t always right. If any of us were, well, things would be much different in life. Failure is always there. Its not there so we will quit; but its there so we will keep trying. We would have no idea on how to try anything… if we didn't know what not to do. Don’t make yourself think you will always fail… because that would never be true. If you even thought that, you would just add another thing to what is wrong which is what we all wouldn’t want in the first place! Imagine that.


The fear of failing is always there too. Never listen to it… unless you actually want to end up loosing.
When your feeling down… don’t give up. You’ll never know what tomorrow will be like if you don’t try and you give up! Sure there are times when things go wrong. If they do, its not like they always will. Have the courage to prove yourself wrong by keeping yourself going and trying. Only then will you see that you can go on.


There always.. Always is something more to find. We never know until we search for it.
The times when we are down.. Remember that it’s not your fault!!! Don’t blame yourself for things!!!!! Taking responsibility is one thing… but blame is another. Most of the time, there isn’t need to blame anyone at all! You can get into the habit of thinking that everything that happens is because of yourself. That you made it wrong. That you are awful. No! You aren’t!!!!!!! Remember that.


The weight of the world on your shoulders can crush anyone. But if you think that no one cares for you; that everyone hates you, your wrong. People DO care. Everywhere you are, there is someone who cares. It doesn’t matter who you are. People do care! And they always will. No matter what.

Also, you’ll never know until you try…


There are good times. Not only the bad. Things CAN be great if you make them to be.
Last of all… with hate, love, joy, sorrow, anger alike… you are how you are, and that’s perfect and always will be. Everyone is perfect and just remember that. There is nothing better, than you.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Always someone to talk to right?
But that's one of the hardest things to do...so is it worth trying?
ugh forget it.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Julian you are not stupid, you are an amazing person, a great brother, and a close friend to me remember that :D

now go to bed lol

The Renegade

haha for like a little while i forgot my password so i couldnt get on... but anyway, heres a poem i wrote thursday. its um... well. yes. yes it is.



The Renegade
By Julian Starkey

The renegade flees town
The road that goes way down
The one that takes him round
Beautiful chains no longer bound

He has lost all
Took a great big fall
What is his real true call?
No longer has the great hall

He is no longer wanted
By everyone he was taunted

He used to have the greatest girl
Her beauty encircled the whole world
Her wonderful hair and its curl
A hand movement, a hair twirl

But now that girl has been lost
Nothing gained, a real great cost
On the streets he was tossed
Just a shirt and shoes, living off moss

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

the devil

this is a poem i started yesterday but finished today about 2 substitute teachers i had... they were terrible. good thing im really quiet in class lol


The Devil
By Julian Starkey
In “honor” of the devils at my school. May they die very painfully.

The devil sits in her chair
Watching, glaring, over there
Taking oxygen out of the air
Looks at us and does not care

The devil says, “You’re a liar”.
Lighting Ryan up in fire
Our salvation is very dire
She turns you into a crier

The demon spawn is waiting for you
She knows when your death is due
A black glass sword, her blade strikes true
Strips you of your clothes and shoes

And down to hell you go
With the devil in your heart

Monday, October 6, 2008

first post! (not about love)


hey! this is a poem i wrote during history class... obviously you can tell what war we are doing right now... so yeah. first poem not about love! woohoo! =)

The Brother’s War
By Julian Starkey
In memory of all those who died in the American Civil War, and all the military world wide

A day of judgment, a battle won
Writing progress, the history done
Glad it ended before my son
In a museum rests my gun

During war, we hope to win
Is fighting my brother a bad sin?
Telling stories to my kin
Finding books in the bin

Army travelled so very far
Rest and drink at the bar
Look in the mirror, see who you are
Veteran plates on my car

My only brother has been killed
Read his letters see what he willed
Empty house remains so stilled
Tell the mayor he can’t be billed

Flying high is our banner
Flying gently in this manner
On the hill we will stand there
Looking at the horses handler

The Letter


Here is another love poem that a wrote... this one about a letter and lack of communication... *sigh* when will i write a poem not about love? look up ;)


The Letter
By Julian Starkey

Please, just write me a letter
Come on, tell me how you are
It will make everything better
Since we live so far

Tell me what’s up girl
I need to know about you
You make my world twirl
Is this love really true?

I’m never giving up
Gunna try some more
Take a drink from my cup
Money for you till I’m poor

Saturday, October 4, 2008

The Summoning


I just had a random inspiration to write a poem about summoning spirits... dark, huh? hehe... this is just a short thing i wrote 5 minutes ago. the good poem is below this. i think the one below this is my best one yet so... check it out!!



The Summoning
By Julian Starkey

Must bring it back, summoning in the park
Its music for a séance, in the dark
If it works we will make our mark
Bringing back spirits, did you see the spark?
Silence the dogs, they may bark
The summon is over, we must embark
Bringing our spirits, there’s no remark
The dead is now back, look at them stark

THE LONGEST POEM I EVER WRITTED


this is the longest poem i ever writted... and its still in progress... its... wow long. hope you like it so far, ill edit this post later to publish the final poem. and if you see any errors please let me know... *ahem* lilac... ;) love ya







The World in My Eyes
By Julian Starkey

This is exactly how I was taught
Survival of the fittest, what I had sought
Using tweezers, a fly is caught
Getting a job, that’s how she was bought
Did she really deserve what she got?
Mercury slugs, you are shot
The artist, the artist, the odyssey wrought
Demons and angels, where they fought

Painting with shadows, missing the light
Into a vacuum, flying a kite
Fighting the prince with all of your might
His bleeding teeth sure do bite
Fixing a hole, what a wonderful sight
Born anew love birds, what a delight
In the city streets, people fight
What makes all of this right?

I have promised her, I will
Pull out a sniper rifle, will I kill?
She waits there, waiting until
I wait here, getting bad chills
The bear has been fired from the mill
Working to earn his share to fill
He has to pay all of those bills
Wishing and wondering, we must remain still

Take some E, power to the max
Stepping boldly onto some tacks
Running over water, gotta send that fax
Side by side, on railroad tracks
Big Blue behind us, watching our backs
Running away, don’t wanna pay tax
This is my story, here are the facts
Slip in the poison, Gatorade full of lax

Too far is the ledge, give me a toss
Savior Leah, what is the cost?
Nothing is won when all is lost
Unsteady bridge, the universe across
On the south side grows the moss
Nobody’s gain, everyone’s loss
Sneaking in the secret sauce
Your own mind is your toughest boss

Marry my wife, gunna have some kids
Selling the trailer to the highest bid
Pop open the jar, take off the lid
You take attack, I’ll take mid
I never lie, I only kid
Go to the mall, it’s where he hid
Get the water, it must be rid
Look me up on YouTube, I posted some vids

Only for thatgirl, do I sing
I’ll buy her a diamond – silver ring
Just to prove she’s worth more than any human being
Roll it up, smoke it, and give it a fling
Suck it up boy, it may sting
The gold on her chest is her only bling
Don’t be a perv, look for the real meaning
It is hidden, try harder thinking

Don’t pay attention in class, don’t know what they teach
Random bearded guy and what he did preach
Hold out your hand, please try to reach
Making out and sex, all on the beach
Skin smells like lilacs, soft as a peach
Passing out drugs, there’s some for each
Three nations, distributed by a leech
Behind the wall now, we must breach

Still on the beach, here we lie
Gazing the stars that light up the sky
Stay with me forever, we will never die
Don’t wanna get dressed, don’t like to try
Big, brown, beautiful, hazel eyes
When I’ve got you I will never cry
If you leave me I have got to know why
Look at my eyes now, they are no longer dry

You must let die and you must let live
Never receive, all you did was give
I wanna do it again, want it to relive
What was the reason? The real motive?
Go into court, who’s the real plaintiff
Like a dream or a fairytale, it seemed fictive
Who is the prince? I am passive
Now I am weak, no longer active

This couldn’t have happened, it doesn’t seem real
All I’ve got now is what I could steal
Not enough money to afford a meal
Gunna get that girl, but I need a wheel
What is your problem, what is the deal?
Met her in a shirt of beautiful teal
On my knees before you I’m gunna kneel
A stamp and ink, I’ll set my seal

The candle in my heart is no longer lit
As I exist I just feel like shit
All over I feel like I’ve been hit
By a giant spider, it’s like I’ve been bit
Clothing of tears, it’s what I knit
How my love for you feels, no words really fit
How to mend a broken heart, you have the kit
A bottomless hole, fall down a pit

It all started from a summer in the city
Just my luck, damn she’s pretty
Beat the system, we are witty
Took it slow, itty-bitty
Drunk from Lipton lemon iced-tea
This cool cat misses his kitty
After we split I just feel shitty
Now she’s gone, truly a pity

I’ll never get her back, would you like to bet?
She was the master, and I, her pet
The cost is too great, the price is set
It’s not my choice, but it must be let
I’m depressed now, just like we met
This is like trying to catch fish with a broken net
I want to give up, but yet
You must never give up, and never fret

Raindrops are falling now, upon my head
Her love letters were the first I ever read
Used to give up on love and just stay in bed
My heart is heavy, it feels like lead
It was her love that kept me fed
I promised her we would never be dead
Do you recall exactly what she said?
I can’t make promises, its fate that led

The uncertain future fills the air
Do you remember what happened there?
My love is for her, and I cannot share
That small girl, is she still in the bear?
Such beautiful, flowing, brown hair
She was the only one who really did care
What do I do… do I dare?
I didn’t think the decision was all that fair